


I lied

by Thea_rainbow



Series: Ben and Mike prompts [53]
Category: Sorted (Website) RPF
Genre: Caring!Ben, Character Death, Like really sick, M/M, Sick!Mike, its kinda really sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-16
Updated: 2015-12-16
Packaged: 2018-05-07 02:59:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5440976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thea_rainbow/pseuds/Thea_rainbow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anonymous said to benxmike:<br/>"you said it'll be fine"</p>
            </blockquote>





	I lied

**Author's Note:**

> a really sad twist because i listen to sad music  
> enjoy

„You said it will be fine.“ Ben sat there, surrounded by piles upon piles of doctors notes, scans, blood charts after finding them under a box in the attic. Mike found him there hours later. He wasn’t able to move after what he had found.

“I lied.”Mike whispered, kneeling in front of his husband, hands shaking as they tried to grasp the newest documentation about the final results out of Ben's strong hold on them.

“You said you will be fine.” His voice broke, leaving a trail of words unspoken in the air between them. “It was just a tiny rash, something harmless…”

“I lied.” Mike repeated.

“You will never be fine again, will you?”With a sad nodding of his head, Ben was moving, hugging him, pressing himself as close as he could, pressing tears into Mike's shirt.

“How long….” Ben took a deep breath, face squashed against Mike's shoulder. “How long do you have left?”

“A few months tops.” Mike confessed, fingers cradling through brown hairs.

“When were you going to tell me?”Ben suppressed a sob that boiled in his throat, settling back onto his knees.

“Never.”

“But…”

“I wanted to make you hate me. Hate me so much you wouldn’t care for me or my death.”

“I could never hate you.” Ben whispered, curling a hand around Mike's jaw, holding his husband as he shook his head, over and over again.

“I never expected that you find out. I told myself I could have these few months with you, maybe less. But I could have you without the worries making your mind heavy, or our relationship damaged. We could live like normal. We could love us like we always do. I never wanted to drag you into this… this fuckup of my life.” Mike explained, biting his lips as tears also gathered in the corner of his eyes.

“I wasn’t ready to see you suffer because of me. I will never be ready to see you suffer like right now.”

“We are married. As in good so in bad.” Ben exclaimed, looking back down at the things around him.

“We can do this together. Okay?”

* * *

 

At the end, Mike sat on their sofa day in and day out, too weak to move much as the illness captured more and more of his brain, of his body. Ben was steady at his side. Only in the middle of the night when Mike fought for sleep, Ben was in the bathroom, echoes of his sobs turned into Mike's lullaby for the last few weeks of his life.

“I will never forget you.” Ben whispered one evening, Mike against his chest as he drank the last bit of soup Ben made.

“I will always remember your smile. Your heartwarming eyes. The way you laughed. The way you said yes, both times to fulfill my dreams of marrying you. I will never forget you. Forget us. I will never stop loving you.”

Mike who had, until this point, never really talked about his death, placed the bowl of soup on the ground before turning in Ben's arms, looking into brown wet eyes with wonder and tears in his.

“I will never forget you. I don’t care what happens afterward, but forgetting how much I love you is unbelievable.” Gently, Mike pressed his lips to Ben's, so so soft, melting into the warmth of the kiss. The love.

* * *

 

Dragging a hand over the unforgiving stone, Ben smiled sadly at the name engraved into the limestone, still white and clean. Untouched from nature’s wildness.

“I love you.” He whispered, lowering the red rose onto the white stone, leaving it like a drop of blood in the sea of whiteness.

“I miss you.” He breathed in, squaring his shoulders back from the slumbered position before lowering him into a squad.

“Today I remembered the day we went to New York together, you know where we spend around 10 hours at an airport because most flights were delayed……”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> and like always  
> my darling beta [saskia](http://www.littlegrayfishes.tumblr.com)  
> [my blog](http://www.luvemishacollins.tumblr.com)  
> and our benxmike [blog](http://www.benxmike.tumblr.com)  
>   
> 


End file.
